Plain English Business Training Tips
Subject lines , especially when writing business documents (most effective when written in plain language) are among the first things readers see as they go through their inboxes. From them, readers make judgments about the content of the messages (in business pieces written in plain language for effectiveness) and the skill of the writers. Meaty subject lines help readers and writers alike to file messages and find them later.
Pack the subject line with meaning
Rethink any subject line that’s a vague word or two. This principle rules out unhelpful subject lines such as Hello, Stuff, and Help. The best subject line is longer and more informative, like a newspaper headline. It goes beyond identifying the (business writing) topic to saying something about it. Readers needn’t open the message to get a good idea of what’s inside:
For
Subject: Parking
Subject: Staff meeting
Try
Seeking Two Parking Spaces
Staff meeting moved to July 1
Don’t try to make your reader curious. Don’t add just anything (using plain language, of course) to avoid sending a blank subject line. Get right to the most significant fact (in the business document you are writing based on plain language) of your message. Many messages make requests or give answers. By putting either in the subject line, you’ll save words later:
For
Subject: Copies of Guides
Alison,
Can you spare 10 copies of eWriting? I need them by May 3. Our last production run was 10 copies short, and the next run isn’t until June 3. Thanks!
Lefty
Try
Subject: Need 10 eWriting by May 3
Alison,
Our last production run was 10 copies short, and the next run isn’t until June 3. Thanks!
Lefty
In a routine message to a familiar reader, the subject line may say it all. Just remember to end it with your name so the reader knows you’re finished:
Subject: I’ll come by at 4 pm –Sebastian
Keep subject lines current
In the back and forth of emails, the original subject can become stale quickly, which doesn’t matter much if an exchange is routine and short lived. But when your message changes a significant conversation, update your subject line. The change distinguishes your message from the others in the thread:
Subject: RE: Fuel Economy of Trucks (WAS: Fuel economy of cars)
Subject: RE: Returning unused funds (WAS: Award Document for…)
The two examples orient a reader by keeping at least some of the previous subject line (of the written business exchange). In the second example, the three ellipsis periods substitute for minor matter that would have lengthened the subject line needlessly. Changing the subject line won’t break the thread; all the messages in a series will still appear one on top of the other.
Front load the subject line
An informative subject line starts fast. It communicates even if the reader uses a BlackBerry or other handheld device whose inbox defaults to only the first few words of the subject. Here’s how a meager subject line might grow into something both informative and front loaded:
Subject: Proposal
Subject: Proposal for May and August writing classes
Subject: Proposal for writing classes in May and August
To make a special message stand out for readers who may get many dozens of emails every day, start with a word in all caps that gives the general idea. A few examples: REMINDER, UPDATE, URGENT, DECISION.
Subject: ACTION–Approval for Report on Ozone Control Act
Subject: INFO–Morrison Case reaches NAFTA Tribunal
Such flags have a long history. The U.S. Social Security Administration re-quires that subject lines of all memos end with ACTION or INFO. But to make your flags visible in an inbox that has a narrow subject column, place them first.
Treat unrelated subjects in separate messages
Avoid putting unrelated subjects in the same message. A rushed reader may respond to the first subject and never get to the next one—a virtual certainty if the next subject lurks below the first screen, to be discovered only if the reader scrolls. Besides, when the subjects are unrelated, just where do you and your reader file the message or look for it later?
If a message covers a couple of loosely related subjects, you might touch on them in the subject line:
For
Subject: Schedule update
Subject: May 8 class
Try
June class delayed, July class confirmed
Equipment and room arrangement for May 8 class
Understand some oddities of Outlook
Most email programs warn you if you try to send a business message written in plain language whose subject line is blank—a handy feature that prevents sending prematurely. But for all its power, Outlook 2003 won’t flag the omission. Your message will just go, and readers will be treated to an unhelpful <no subject>.
Still, Outlook 2003 does a fine job of letting you peek at a message before opening it completely. With AutoPreview enabled, your inbox displays the subject line and the first three lines of text of message in your inbox. With Reading Pane enabled, you can read the first paragraphs of a message by clicking on the entry in the inbox. (Settings are in the main mail View menu.)
Yet many readers don’t use either AutoPreview or Reading Pane. They get so many business messages every day that they need all their screen real estate just to see the subject lines—which takes us back to the big idea of this section: a long and informative subject line (based on and written using plain language) gives readers the general idea without having to look further.